... and then the kids came along...

A New Beginning

It was all so easy in the early days. Those heady days of romance where you had the time and made the effort to put each other first. And then the kids came along...

It's ironic that the very manifestation of love can become such a threat to it. When children appear on the scene the dynamics of many marriages alters irretrievably.

Pushed Aside

Fathers in particular can experience feelings of jealousy as the arrival appears to replace them in the affections of their wife. A doting mother, too tired to make much effort on anything else other than feeding and changing the baby and keeping the house running, can unwittingly send out signals of coolness towards her spouse.

Too Tired to Care

Severe fatigue can affect marital relations and reduce the amount of carefree hours spent together. It can also reduce the level and quality of communication taking place between husband and wife. This is probably the single most harmful affect of the new family situation. 

A lack of communication during a period of increased stress is a recipe for discord and even disaster.

Put Things in Perspective

Some parents become overly devoted to their offspring - revolving their whole life around them. In reality this is unhealthy and a proper balance needs to be instilled into family life.

Kids are a blessing and provide parents with the ultimate satisfaction in life. However, allowing the kids to be the sole purpose of your life is not healthy for you or your marriage.

Raising children with a joint approach and ensuring that the family dynamic is positive and supportive for all is not easy to pull off. It is however achievable.

One thing's for sure; if your marriage is strong in the first place or if you have learned the tips and tactics to maintain a healthy marriage, raising kids is a far less risky business for your relationship.